Forgiveness

I've been told that I need to forgive.... I know I do. I know I need to let go of what "should have been" and "what could have been". It was what it was. I don't blame Mary's judge for what she did, but I have felt strongly about how her situation was handled. The trial and conviction by the judge who handled Mary's situation had upset me tremendously. Her life was in his hands. The situation is too long to describe in my blog. It doesn't matter now. My way of expressing forgiveness is by writing a letter to this judge. I will be happy to share:

Dear Judge Walker,

I'm sure you know that my sister, Mary McCraw took her life on March 22, 2008. She had some demons she was dealing with. You did not help her with your mandate to jail. It may not be your place to look at a person's past record of life to determine the level of punishment, that is too bad. Mary did not have any sort of record. She was a teacher, a mother, an inspiration to all who came in contact with her.I hope you learn about the disease of addiction. It is not pretty. It is not prejudice, it gets the best of us. Doctors, Lawyers, Teachers.... Mary's was a late progression. There was hope, she was going to get better. Do you know Mary got beat up, molested and robbed in jail? Maybe you don't have any sorrow. I wouldn't expect you too.

I just wanted you to know that I have forgiven you for not stepping down from my sisters case when you should have. Because of your close relationship with her in-laws, there was serious conflict of interest. You treated Mary as if she was a hardened repeat offender... She didn't have a chance with you as her judge. No Mercy. So so sad. Well,we know who the real judge is. She is with him now! I pray for you and hope you learn the difference between someone who is sick and someone who is bad.

I don't blame you for Mary's death, but I do acknowledge the wrongful sentence you chose for a sweet soul that needed help, not shackles. She made a couple bad choices but you broke her. She's at peace now and I guess I have you to thank for that.

You can be angry for my words or you can put it behind you and make a difference in everything you do from this day forward. May God be with you in your work and home. I believe you get back what you put out there.

A Loving Sister,

Jeni